When I went through my divorce the one feeling I can describe is OVERWHELMED!
Where do I start, what do I do, how can I afford this on my own? I get it…it can feel scary, overwhelming and down right out of control. Many women know well over a year in advance that the relationship is crumbling or that you are done. Once you recognize this, you need to start planning so that you are in control and have a plan and know your options. You can’t assume that your spouse is going to be easy to work with. Pain, anger and resentment will happen.
1. Review your Credit: Have your mortgage planner pull your credit bureau so you know exactly what you are liable for. You may have co-signed for a spouse’s debt and not realized it.
2. Gather ALL your financial records. If you feel your spouse is hiding assets or could be, you need to get researching that soon. Keep an eye out for any statements and get a copy. It happens a lot.
3. Open a Post office Box. Have all your mail re-directed to a post box. Once spouses get into the emotional turmoil of divorce behaviours such as stealing and destroying mail happen often.
4. Open a new Bank account with a Credit Union. Not a Bank. https://taxsolutionscanada.com/how-does-cra-find-out-where-you-bank/. Put money away now for legal fees and potential rent or “get away” money.
5. Get new credit cards in your name now. Once the separation starts, remove your name immediately from ALL joint accounts.
6. Take personal inventory of everything in your home and any other assets and record the value. Take pictures and videos, record how it was attained such as “engagement ring” “inheritance” or “gift”. This will be important later when you need to dissolve the matrimonial assets.
7. Change your Will and Medical Directive. Last thing you want is your going through a separation and something bad happens and your leaving an angry ex to advise on your medical future. “yah, just pull the plug on her”.
You will feel so much better once you have some control and knowledge of what is going on financially with you and your spouse before you decide to leave the marriage. This will start to put you in an emotionally stronger position to make decisions later.
Kiki Berg is a Professional Mortgage Strategist that focuses on divorce financial strategies for both men and women. Reach out to kiki.mortgages@gmail.com or 778-808-7756
